Don't Let Go
by I-am-the-survivor
Summary: Clarice has been missing for a week. Something isn't right. John should've found her by now. Heard her, something. He should be able to track her. But he's got nothing. She's just… gone.


**Boy oh boy has this thing been a work in progress for a whiiiile. I had the idea for this back towards 1x04 but I couldn't put everything together but finally everything has come together. I hope you guys enjoy it as much as I enjoyed writing it**

Feet tap arrhythmically on the cracked floorboards as John paces from one side of the room to another. It wasn't supposed to happen like this at all. They'd gone to do some simple reconnaissance when they were ambushed by Sentinal Services. Clarice had made a portal to get them all back safely, well all except her. Just as she was about to leap through herself her body began seizing, tasers catching her back. He tried to jump back through before the portal closed but Lorna and Marcos held him back. He had only been able to watch as she collapsed with her portal sealing her off from them.

It'd been a week since and they've not heard a word about her. No file, no recommended transfer, nothing. The backs of his eyes detail gruesome experiences. He had to be able to track her.

"You're thinking too loudly." Sonia's voice cuts through his focus like a blade. Dejectedly he glances up at her leaning against a wall casually. It's as if she doesn't know what's at stake. Hell, he's not sure he knows what's at stake.

"We need to get moving."

"Where Johnny?" Pity laces in her voice. He knows she means well but the tone only serves to irritate him more. "You're the best tracker I know and you don't even know where to begin. Reed and Sage have had an eye on the files for the past three days. There've been no reports of a transfer. Maybe she got out again."

"If she would've gotten out she would've come back." He sighs slumping onto the couch. He just needs to listen.

"Not if she doesn't know where she is. It's been a week. You know better than anyone how far they could take her in a week." She has a point. The farthest she's held a portal for is from the alleyway to the Underground. Even then she was sent into the feverish shock and nearly dismantled the entire place. "If she's lost she can't portal farther than where she can see and even then you've seen first hand how many portals she can do before she wears herself out."

"I would've found her by now." He stands again trying to focus.

 _Sonia trying to calm him._ _Children giggling downstairs. Caitlin's hushed voice as she coaches another mutant through getting their shoulder reset. Lauren bickering with Andy. Sage's fingers hitting the keyboard at a steady pace. Too many voices. Too much noise._

"Be quiet!" He shouts throwing the nearest object at the wall. Sonia backs off hands crossed against her chest. Lorna and Marcos appear in the door at the sound of the yell. Marcos's eyes are sympathetic while Lorna's are angry. Not at him though, at the situation they've been placed in. Yet it worked. The Underground is quiet for a few beats. Still he hears nothing. Not her voice, not her footsteps. Nothing traceable. Then the noise kicks in again. It starts with worried whispers before developing into a crescendo once more.

Lorna nods to Sonia who hastily leaves the room huffing at her inability to calm him. "Look I know you're frustrated-"

"I'm a hell of a lot more than frustrated Lorna." He cuts off. "We should've found her by now. She has to be somewhere. They have to have her somewhere.

"And we're looking John." Marcos sighs. "We're not giving up on her."

"What if she-"

"She won't end up like Gus." It's her turn to cut him off now. "I know you care about her-"

"I don't-"

"Don't bullshit me Proudstar. Lying isn't good for the baby's ears."

"One, pretty sure it doesn't have ears yet. Two, neither is cussing."

"You're joking now. That's a start." She smirks, "We're not done looking for Clarice okay? We'll get her back."

"Thanks Lorna."

"I was here too." Marcos interjects.

"Moral support." She smiles squeezing his arm in comfort. He almost has to roll his eyes at the two. They're almost worse now than when they first got together.

He turns and gets back to the task at hand. He needs to find Clarice.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Clarice jerks awake suddenly, the bright whites of the room blinding her. Her mind boggles trying to piece together the last bits of memory to bring her here. They were on a mission, they were ambushed, she opened a portal, she saw John running towards her as pain licked up her spine. The rest was fuzzy images: needles piercing her skin, black helmets with covered faces bouncing with the bumps of the road, white lab coats with blurred faces hovering over her own.

Connections click at the room develops shape. She jerks again finding her wrists to be strapped down the the table as well her her ankles. Her fingers spark with purple energy but without the capability to bring her hands together she has no ability to pull a portal open.

"Save your energy." Her body snaps again at the sudden presence of a voice. "You're going to need it." She simply stares at the man startled as he struts into the room. "Not the talkative type hm Clarice? Very well." He moves over to the side of the table that she's strapped to. She's able to make out more definitive features now that he's closer. He looks to be in his late thirties, short cleanly cut hair, and a well trimmed beard. In other words he looks like a total asshole. "I'm Dr. Campbell. Honestly for a while there I was afraid they'd given you too much sedative. Of course I instructed to keep you unconscious the whole trip. No worries. We're not set back too much."

"What the hell do you want." She growls, her voice coming out less than menacing from the lack of use.

"Very simple. You're going to help us find your friends." He grins. There's nothing more that she wants right now than to punch out all of his cocky teeth.

"Us?"

"Well me, I want the two siblings; the Struckers. Detective Bell, however, is very content in putting you and every one of your companions into the tightest prisons we can find." He continues fiddling with the machine by the table, twisting knobs and reading off numbers more to himself than to her.

"Why would I help you?" She seethes. He turns his attention to her now sticking two things to each of her wrists. She twists trying to see but he pushes her back down. Despite her struggling he manages to stick two electrodes on either side of her temple.

"Well you see, one day my buddy calls me and he says that his energy readings are off the charts. Now of course we couldn't pinpoint an area but it just so happened to coincide with two events. One being the escape of the Strucker children and the other being a portal that opened up on a road that lead to the home of a nice family with 5 kids."

"You son of a bitch." She snaps lunging at him again.

"Now I studied teleportation a lot. In fact before your grand escape you were meant to be my next prospective subject Ms. Fong. If I'm correct you made that portal because it was close to a place that made you feel safe. And wasn't it handy to find that upon investigation of the home there'd been a break in. Did that home mean something to you Clarice?" Tears sting at the back of her eyes but she refuses to show weakness, shutting them tightly instead. "Now if I were to say, harm you enough. I have a theory that your powers would activate once more and lead us to the new place where you feel safe: The Underground."

He turns back to the machines once more fiddling with the panel. It isn't until now that she's very aware of the heavy strap across her ribcage. Panic seeps in as the machine whirrs to life filling the white room with a steady buzz. He turns back to her just as he hits a button. Pain licks up her arms and at her temples as electricity courses through her body. A scream rips from her throat against her will. Muscles twitch uncontrollably and her back arches off the table, limbs fighting against their confines.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

John wakes to the sound of two screams echoing through the quiet walls of the Underground. "Clarice," He whispers recognizing one of the voices. He springs out of bed racing through the halls as he tracks the sound. He busts open the door finding one of their newest members, Molly, pushed against the wall on her bed screeching in fear her eyes glowing a golden hue. Zingo stands at the foot of the bed her tail tucked between her legs. A cross between a growl and a whine escapes her as the fur on the back of her neck stands high. Not far from where she stands a portal flickers in and out of existence marking the other source of a muffled scream.

His heart drops in realization. This isn't a scream of adrenaline or effort. No, rather it sounds more like she's in an extreme amount of pain.

The door hits the wall again marking the appearance of yet another person. Another of their newest arrivals stands in the doorway, staff clutched in one hand. She rushes over to Molly kneeling beside her. "Hey," He hears shuffling beside him as he keeps his eyes on the portal. Nothing more than flickers of purple and pink mark its existence; not even a small hole. "Molly it's okay. They're not here. We're safe. They didn't find us." Molly's screams die down as she seems to recognize the older girl, Nico he thinks her name was. "What the hell is going on?"

The portal dies now leaving the room quiet once more other than Zingo's occasional whimpers. "It was Clarice."

"The missing girl?" He turns now. Nico has Molly clutched to her chest, the staff abandoned at her feet. He half wonders where the sister is but after what he just saw honestly not much is on his mind except minding Clarice.

"Yeah…" He sighs pushing his hair back. He kneels on the bed placing a hand on Molly's shoulder. "Are you okay? Did anything come through the portal?" The girl raises her head now, her eyes returned to their normal dark shade. She shakes her head curls bouncing with the movement.

"I just saw the light and the screaming I thought…"

"She thought our parents found us." Nico finishes. "They can't. Not without the staff okay?" A jerky nod from the girl.

"Can you get Gert?" Her voice is quiet but he can just make out her words. Nico nods leaving the room. Zingo hops onto the bed now curling against her leg.

"Shout for me if this happens again okay?" A nod and he leaves. As he passes he sees Nico and the rest of the group of them huddled together. All of them are equally protective over Molly, that much was evident when they stepped in front of her when they first found them. They looked exhausted and hungry. Not that they had much room to spare he offered room, if only for a night. Old Lace, their white Akita glares up at him from her station in the center of the group. Something about her is unnerving. She's not an ordinary dog he can tell that much. They speak in hushed voices but he respects the privacy of the group enough to mind his own business.

He has a plan now he just needs to set it into motion.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"You're insane." The words leave the telepath's lips almost shocked that he'd even dare to ask her of such a task. The portals had appeared nine more times throughout the night. None of them bigger than the last but he pushed Molly to go room with Gert anyways. They can't risk calling after her, lest she open the portal and they're unprepared for what lies on the other side.

"We just need you to communicate with Clarice. We need to get her location so that we can help. She's trying to get back here but she either can't or she's not letting herself."

"I can only do it if I'm a few feet away."

"Technically with the portal you will be." Lorna interjects from her spot on the couch where she's studying her knife.

"But-"

"Will you at least try?" He begs. He's not sure they have many other options. Esme hesitates before nodding. She takes her place just in time for the portal to start flashing into existence once again. Her eyes flash as she focuses.

"I got her." She gasps. "She's in a lot of pain."

"Didn't guess that from the screaming." Lorna shrugs.

"Where is she?"

"I don't know. It's a lab of some sort. I can tell you what she knows but besides that, not much else."

"What is happening?"

"They're trying to get me to open a portal to the Underground. They know I lost control." Lorna sits up as Esme begins speaking for Clarice. Their eyes meet half startled, half concerned.

"What do they want?" Lorna asks.

"He wants Andy and Lauren."

"He? Who's he?"

"Campbell. The one you saw at the father's house. The one who tested on Pulse." A pit settles in John's stomach. So they did take her there. Now they're experimenting on her like they did to Gus.

"Clarice you need to let the portal open."

"What no!" Lorna and Esme cry out at the same time.

"It's the only way to get to you. You need to trust me Clarice."

"I can't I-" Esme drops to the ground as the connection is suddenly severed with the disappearance of the portal. Lorna rushes to her side. "I'm fine." She assures pulling herself to her feet. "I'm fine."

He and Lorna share a glance again. There's one thing for sure, Clarice is in trouble and they need to get to her fast.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Clarice falls against the metal table panting in exhaustion. She's trying not to show the nutcase that he's breaking her but it's hard. Even without the electric shock she can feel her powers thrumming at the tips of her fingers. As if at any moment it will overcome her and drag her beneath the water. Begging to be released energy claws at the inside of her ribs.

 _Clarice you need to let the portal open._

Even despite the words coming from the telepath's mind she swears she could hear John saying it. It's not like him to be so reckless. That sounds more like a plan either Lorna or the Struckers would think up.

 _Clarice you need to trust me._

Now that part was undeniably him. Nobody else would ask her of something that big. Truth be told she only trusts John.

The shocks come less frequent now. Only every two hours instead of one. It's almost as if he's afraid of killing her. She almost laughs at the bitterness of the thought.

Power thrums against the tips of her fingers as she actually begins to take it into consideration. If he's telling her to do it then… She closes her eyes sinking into her memories. Suddenly she's back at the Underground. Zingo's soft fur beneath her fingertips, Norah's shy eyes glancing up at her, John's arms wrapped around her as he holds her to him like he's afraid she'll disappear if he lets go.

She takes a deep breath and flings her hand out.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"You're out of your mind! There's no way in hell we can take them. Who knows what they have behind that portal! She's protecting us from something!"

"This is different Lorna." He sighs. He's already ordered an evacuation lead by Sonia and Sage. He demanded that the Struckers go to. They weren't going to let them get caught by any means. That's exactly what they want.

"How is it different?" She yells waving her arms in frustration.

"What if it were Marcos!" He snaps not realizing the gravity beneath what he'd said. Lorna's mouth snaps shut angry tears surfacing just at the suggestion. He can't explain it but he can't lose her. Not Clarice. "It's… complicated."

"John…" Marcos sighs. A flash interrupts the three calling their attention. A portal rips open revealing Clarice lying on a metal table in a white room. Her skin is pale, eyes foggy but she's looking towards them.

"Stay here! Make sure nobody gets through!" He calls. Before either of them can protest he leaps through the portal. Clarice's eyes flutter shut and the portal flickers to a close behind him. It's the first time she's opened a portal without holding it open herself, he remarks. Well except for when she was sick.

In a flurry of movement he catches the arm of a doctor right before he can pierce him in the neck with a needle. He wraps his arm around his throat slowly depriving him of oxygen before he can alert anyone else to his presence. He lowers the man not so gently to the ground as he loses consciousness.

As if on cue a scream rips from the previously unconscious Clarice. He rushes to her side as her body begins seizing. His eyes follow the electrodes attached to each temple following them back to the machine. On impulse he punches the thing making it stop. Her body collapses onto the table once more but that definitely alerted people. He pulls the electrodes off her temples and wrists ripping off the straps confining her as well.

He gathers her into his arms as lifting her. Two men charge into the room in response to the commotion. He turns his back shielding her just as their bullets begin to fire. He charges head first at the other side of the room bursting through the wall.

"John." The quiet whimper draws his attention. He looks down at Clarice, her breath is shallow and her heartbeat is weak. He picks up his pace running as fast and as far away as he can from his pursuers. He spares another look down at her. Her eyes are glassy, not nearly as bright as normal.

"Clarice, it's going to be hard but I need you to open a portal." A whine leaves her lips. She's tired, he knows. "I know. But we're surrounded. I can't run forever." She lifts her arms weakly, purple sparks pulling weakly at the air. "Come on. You can do it. I trust you." She throws her arm out in front of them. The hole is small. Just enough to see Lorna and Marcos through it. He hears grunts behind them. He can only assume that Lorna took care of them. "Come on Clarice."

"I can't." She sobs. His heart breaks for her. He hadn't seen her so helpless since discovering her family.

"Hold onto me." She does as he says wrapping her arms around his neck. He takes a deep breath before reaching through the portal. It wasn't any bigger than a basketball and steadily getting smaller. He lets out a shout of pain as it tries to close on his hand. Clarice shakes with effort in his arms as she tries to mentally hold it open as long as she can. He swears he hears a crack in his hand. Using all of his strength he forces the portal to get larger, just enough so he can tumble through.

Cradling Clarice in his lap he pushes back her hair. Marcos and Lorna are hovering over him in seconds. He knows they both can see all the holes ripped in the back of his t-shirt. It doesn't matter. As long as Clarice wasn't hit. He can deal with a few dozen welts left by the bullets.

Clarice is unconscious again, she's unbelievably pale and her heartbeat is weak but she's alive and here. Marcos dismisses himself to the roof to go signal that it's safe to return.

He doesn't leave her side the entire time.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Clarice jerks awake with a gasp, sparks flashing on her fingertips. She's no longer constrained. She can escape. She can-

"Clarice!" Strong hands grip her shoulders forcing her eyes to focus. She's not in the white room. No rather she spies the dull browns that make the Underground. The strong hands belong to John Proudstar who's still talking to her though she can't hear over the thrumming in her ears. His dark eyes settle her forcing her to catch the breath that escaped her lungs.

"John…" She breathes. Without thinking she wraps her arms around his neck holding him with her. She breathes in the familiar scent of him allowing her heart rate to settle. She's about to pull away, embarrassed when she realizes he's holding on too. One of his hands clutches the back of her head to his shoulder the same way it did that day at the farmhouse.

"You're safe." He mumbles into her hair. "I got you. You're safe." Slowly she lets go letting her hands trail down his arms. She pulls away in shock when her fingers meet plaster. Sure enough a cast covers his right hand.

"How is that even possible?" She asks confused. "I thought you were Mr. Indestructible."

"Apparently holding open portals is an exception. I broke my hand trying to get us out of there." He laughs. "Guess you're a bit stronger than I am." A blush fills her cheeks as she stutters at the compliment.

"How long was I out?" She asks instead.

"Three days. Shame too. You missed the dinosaur."

"The what now?" She asks shocked. She'd sworn he said three days not 65 million years, though her head kind of feels like it.

"Yeah. We had a group of six runaways come in. They were hiding from their parents and needed a place to stay. Had a white Akita with them. I thought she looked off. Wouldn't have guessed one of them was disguising their pet dinosaur as a dog."

"First you're not indestructible now dinosaurs are no longer extinct?" She asks. "That's a lot of information to process."

"Then you're not going to like that Esme managed to telepathically connect with Lorna's baby and told them that she's a girl." Clarice slumps onto her pillow in shock. If she thought the other two were hard to settle in… A snicker breaks the silence. "I'm joking." He teases earning a punch on the arm. He fake groans rubbing his arm. She appreciates the attempt to lighten the air a bit. Especially after the tense hug. His brow furrows as a pushes back a bit of her hair. "You have another mark." He mumbles.

She grabs the closest reflective surface taking a look at herself. Sure enough, a diamond sits between her eyebrows. Her fingers trace over the mark in shock. Her eyes flash back up to him. He's got that look that if he glances away then she'll disappear again. Without thinking her fingers grip his good hand giving it a gentle squeeze. "Thank you."

"You don't need to-"

"Yes I do. Without you I don't think I could've gotten out of there and I-" He cuts her off this time wrapping his arms around her and holding her to his chest. Tears sting at the back of her eyes. There was a time in her life where she didn't think she would mind dying. She didn't really have anyone she would miss, much less anyone that would miss her. Back there, however, she was afraid. Not just for herself but for them too. She knows she should let go. She doesn't though. She's content in feeling his heartbeat against her chest, his fingers caressing her hair. Her own hands grip the back of his shirt as she buries her face into the side of his neck.

Neither of them want to let go.


End file.
